A few quotes  

Sometimes, when I look at my children, I say to myself ~~"

Lillian, you should have remained a virgin."

Lillian Carter (mother of Jimmy Carter)  

I had a rose named after me and I was very flattered.

But I was not pleased to read the description in the catalog:

"No good in a bed, but fine against a wall."

Eleanor Roosevelt

Last week, I stated this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen.

I have since been visited by her sister,

and now wish to withdraw that statement.

Mark Twain

The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending; and to have the two as close together as possible.

George Burns

Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people only once a year.

Victor Borge

Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.

Mark Twain

By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you'll become happy;

if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.

Socrates

I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.

Groucho Marx

Only Irish coffee provides in a single glass all four essential food groups: alcohol, caffeine, sugar and fat.

Alex Levine

I don't feel old. I don't feel anything until noon.

Then it's time for my nap.

Bob Hope

I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.

W.C. Fields

We could certainly slow the aging process down if

it had to work its way through Congress.

Will Rogers

Don't worry about avoiding temptation as you grow older, it will avoid you.

Winston Churchill

Maybe it's true that life begins at fifty.

But everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out.

Phyllis Diller

By the time a man is wise enough to watch his step;

he's too old to go anywhere.

Billy Crystal

The cardiologist's diet:

If it tastes good, spit it out.

Give me a sense of humor, Lord;

Give me the grace to see a joke,

To get some humor out of life,

And pass it on to other folk.

Amen!

 Most of these folks you expect really good quotes from and they always deliver. The one I never expected was Eleanor Roosevelt. To be in the position she was the lady had an unbelievable sense of humor and used it. I read once from a photographer of her time that she was truely one of those people that was unphotogenic but in person was really beautiful...

                                          As Ever,

                                           skillet