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Raider Nation Fisher

Things my children do pt1

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A conversation between myself and the 3 year old, affectionately known as Monkey.

Monkey: Can I go swimming?

Raider: No we are not going swimming today.

5 minutes later.

Monkey: Can i go swimming?

Raider: I just told you no swimming today.

10 minutes later

Monkey: Can i go swimming now?

Raider: Not today. Tomorrow yes, but not today.

12 minutes later while sitting on the couch.

Monkey: Can i go swimming today?

Raider: Nope. The answer is still the same.

Monkey: Ok.

Monkey walks past me and walks out the back door. Upon reentering he is carrying his swim suit over his shoulder.

Raider: Where are you going with that? I told you no swimming today.

Monkey: I know. (Walks right past me and goes up the stairs).

10 minutes later.

Blondie Sparky: What made you decide Monkey could go swimming?

Raider: I never told him he could go swimming. I said he had to wait until tomorrow.

Enter Monkey wearing his swimsuit.

Blondie Sparky: Well he came and got me up and said you said he could go swimming. Would I help him put on his bathing suit. 

Raider: I didn't say that.

Blondie Sparky: Monkey did you lie to me?

Monkey: I didn't lie. I said, could you help me put on my bathing suit I want to go swimming.

-Scene-

Apparently they have begun to try an play divide and conquer now. Monkey got in trouble with his mom for lying. And is not allowed to go swimming today either. His mom had sinus surgery yesterday and was trying to relax in bed while I was watching the kids like a good husband. I just can't believe that boy went and got his bathing suit and trotted off past me. Like it is the most normal thing in the world to walk around with a bathing suit hung over your shoulder. 

 

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5 minutes ago, Raider Nation Fisher said:

A conversation between myself and the 3 year old, affectionately known as Monkey.

Monkey: Can I go fishing ?

Raider: No we are not going fishing today.

5 minutes later.

Monkey: Can i go fishing ?

Raider: I just told you no fishing today.

10 minutes later

Monkey: Can i go fishing now?

Raider: Not today. Tomorrow yes, but not today.

12 minutes later while sitting on the couch.

Monkey: Can i go fishing today?

Raider: Nope. The answer is still the same.

Monkey: Ok.

Monkey walks past me and walks out the back door. Upon reentering he is carrying his fishing rod over his shoulder.

Raider: Where are you going with that? I told you no fishing today.

Monkey: I know. (Walks right past me and goes up the stairs).

10 minutes later.

Blondie Sparky: What made you decide Monkey could go fishing ?

Raider: I never told him he could go fishing. I said he had to wait until tomorrow.

Enter Monkey carrying his fishing rod..

Blondie Sparky: Well he came and got me up and said you said he could go fishing.  Would I help him tie an FG Knot.. 

Raider: I didn't say that.

Blondie Sparky: Monkey did you lie to me?

Monkey: I didn't lie. I said, could you help me tie an FG knot I want to go fishing.

-Scene-

Apparently they have begun to try an play divide and conquer now. Monkey got in trouble with his mom for lying. And is not allowed to go fishing today either. His mom had sinus surgery yesterday and was trying to relax in bed while I was watching the kids like a good husband. I just can't believe that boy went and got his fishing rod and trotted off past me. Like it is the most normal thing in the world to walk around with a fishing rod slung over your shoulder. 

 

Fixed that one for you ~

:)

A-Jay

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2 hours ago, A-Jay said:

Fixed that one for you ~

:)

A-Jay

LOL

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I had an altercation today with m three year grandson. He chucked a large, hard plastic airplane at me. did not see it coming. split my lip.

First time in over thirty years somebody split my lip.

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Kids! My son is the worst to wrestle with. I am guaranteed to get hurt. He will kick me, knee me, head butt me, something and it's always an "accident ".

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The same three year old has unerring aim. I have to catch him when he jumps in my lap, or I take a knee to the fruit. He will never miss.

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All four of mine are that way. Those bony limbs hurt like hell. I swear they achieve terminal velocity when jumping.

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