What A Year

1. The dumbest thing I bought was a 2020 planner.

2. I was so bored I called Jake from State Farm just to talk to someone. He asked me what I was wearing.

3. 2019: Stay away from negative people. 2020: Stay away from positive people.

4. The world has turned upside down. Old folks are sneaking out of the house and their kids are yelling at them to stay home.

5. This morning I saw a neighbor talking to her dog. She thought her dog understood her. I came in the house and told my cat. We laughed a lot.

6. Every few days try your jeans on. Pajamas will have you believe all is well in the kingdom.

7. Does anyone know if we can take showers yet or should we just keep washing our hands?

8. This virus has done what no woman could do. Cancel sports, shut down all bars and keep men at home.

9. I never thought the comment, I wouldn't touch someone with a 6' pole would become a national policy, but here we are.

10. I need to practice social distancing from the refrigerator.

11. I hope the weather is good tomorrow for my trip to the back yard. I'm getting tired of the living room. 

12. Never in a million years could I have imagined I would go up to a bank teller wearing a mask and ask for money.