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clayton86

Becoming Your Parents

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Does anyone else dread this? not saying my dads a bad guy but been sitting back looking at my recent life events unfold and cant help but notice I'm turning into my father. We both LOVE to fish and we look alike though I didn't get his height I'm 5'9 hes 6'5. But then there's the other things really sticking out to me we both will be divorced the same ages him from my mom at the same age I am now. His also came right when he got out of the Air Force and I'm getting out of the Army as well this year. He divorced and left the military to drive truck guess what I'm gonna do when back state side....yup gonna drive big rigs like he did. It seems crazy how my life is unfolding exactly like his minus the health issues so far I still stand the only person in my family both sides to not have diabetes or cancer by age 21 iv made it to 26 so far knock on wood I have been healthy for the most part.

I kinda fear though becoming him as it seems I am he hasn't remarried since my mother 25 years ago and his health is sadly in the crapper for lack of a better term. He had his first heart attack at 36 and its been a rapid downhill battle since. I'm hoping to continue to beat the health issues though the rest I don't know about.

any one else fear becoming there parents or have already become them

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Oh, yeah! I'm my dad. Went to the same small college, both grew up in Virginia and married Eastern NC girls that we met at that small college, both are in the ministry (preaching at Churches 10 miles apart). We both enjoy hunting and fishing (together)! There are a thousand little things that I could mention, but one memory of our similarities really stands out:

When I was in High School my dad bought a brand new Berkley Lightening Rod and a Shimano Spirex 2000 reel to put on it. About the same time I bought the exact same rod and the exact same reel. We didn't know it until we went out fishing together a few weeks later. We do things like that all the time. Yep, I've turned into my dad.....and I'm perfectly fine with that!

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Clayton... there are obviously some things you mentioned that you do not want to be the "same" but it's cool that you have a lot of similarities. You're still really young, so think of all the positive changes that you can make now that your son will some day hope to emulate. Your future is all yours.

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I don't mind becoming my dad we both are mechanics as well on top of everything else. I think the thing I fear most is his health issues though he has been beating the odds the doctors give him I just hope to not have to play the odds as he is. I just think its interesting we both fish the same, same taste in cars, music, our jobs, hobbies everything.

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No........far from it. My father is a loser who never stays with one women for more than a few years. His rotine usually goes like this...meet women, knock her up, cheat on her, leaves when he gets busted, kocks up new women, cheats on her, leaves..........and on and on. I am one of five children he has with three women. And none of us (that are still alive) want anything to do with him. I had a half brother who died when I was young, a sister who died a few years ago, and two living half sisters. I am more like my grandfather (mothers side) he and my grandmother raised me, everything I do is carbon copy of how he lived his life, married young, worked the same job for 40 years, raised his kids the best he could, paid his bills, kept his word.

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My dad has always provided for his family and done the best he can with what he has. He's always been there for my sister and I and is still with my mom after 30 years. He's far from perfect but as I get older and notice myself doing or acting like he did when I was little it doesn't really bother me, I could certainly do a lot worse than ending up like him.

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In my case the apple didn't fall far from the tree, except my dad was more aggressive than me. Cutting to the chase, if I die being half the man he was, that's going to be just fine with me.

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