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regretlove

What a jerk!

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Let me preface this by saying I do know that ALL men are not like this, and I have been paired with some really nice anglers who have taught me a lot -

This past Sat., I was paired with a young guy from our club who has always professed to be a real "family" man...

We are about an hour into the day and he has caught 2 good keepers, and I haven't caught one yet - I finally hooked a nice fat one on a  homemade spinner bait - he got the net, then once it was in the boat - proceeded to smack me on the butt, and keep his hand there...rubbing...totally on purpose....OMG - I couldn't even believe it - here I was so excited about landing this lunker (5lb.4oz.) and he goes and pulls that crap -

I have fished in tournaments all this year and have not had an encounter like this.  Needless to say, the rest of the day was awkward - he made several more inappropriate comments, and I got off that boat as fast as possible when we got to shore...and had a talk with our pres. who I know very well.

It is well known in our club that I am a happily married woman who is there to fish and learn more about fishing. I dress modestly.  I have been saving for my own boat this past year- I am about half way there.  Unfortunately my husband does not understand why I like to fish - he just doesn't get it, so I really couldn't tell him about this - that would be the end of it for me...

I am just so disappointed that on a day that should have been great (that was the biggest bass I had ever caught) I had to deal with such a moron...who obviously had more on his mind than just fishing.. :(

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thats really lame a great day may have been ruined for u because of that jerk but on a positive note nice job with the new PB ;)

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I hope your club pres does something about this. It sounds like you are inbetween a rock and a hardspot. Your husband deserves to know but I understand the sitiuation. Just hope he doesn't find out from somewhere else. I really hate seeing post like this but there are jerks all over the place in this world. It just gives us tournament anglers a bad name.

Nice fish! Try to forget about the pervert and remember the fish!

CJ

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I'm glad you reported the guy to the club president. I think you should follow up with the president and find out how he's going to handle this. At the very least this guy needs to be suspended. This behavior is not just wrong, it borders on criminal.

For the club to do nothing would be the same as condoning it.

On a personal note, I've got 4 daughters who all love to fish and if some lowlife with a boat tried to pull that crap, I would expect them to stand up for themselves and get the guy off the water.

The men in the club need to support you on this. If not, then it's not a club worth belonging to.

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That really does suck! Hopefully that never has to happen again. Good thing you spoke up and told the pres.

Husband shouldn't get mad at you, but I wouldn't blame him for having some "words" for that guy.

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What a shame that had to happen . Is your club going to approach him about it ? Just remember it is your word against his. I hope you get it corrected.

It is a shame you can't go to your husband for support without feeling he'd make you quit. I hope it works out for you.

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You should follow it up with the president to see what he has done to fix this issue.

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Well, either the clown gets booted from the club or you need to find

another. There is no excuse for that kind of behavior, period!

If you decide to pursue the matter, a strongly worded letter to the

president of the club from your attorney will get his attention, big time.

>:(

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Well, either the clown gets booted from the club or you need to find

another. There is no excuse for that kind of behavior, period!

If you decide to pursue the matter, a strongly worded letter to the

president of the club from your attorney will get his attention, big time.

>:(

Agreed.

Also, I would tell your husband. I know I would be upset if I found out from someone or somewhere other than you.

Besides, any guy that would put his hands on my wife like that would be getting his *** beat. Period.

Also, GOOD FOR YOU that you stood up for yourself. That takes a great amount of courage to make it a point to tell your club pres what happened.

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Well, the more I think about this the madder I get. Talk with your

husband and decide how far you want to go with this, but a criminal

complaint is another option to consider. Regardless of whether the

authorities are willing to prosecute, they will interview the perp and

put him on notice that you mean business and are someone never

to be messed with. The message will come across perfectly clear.

>:(

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If the other men in your club have any kind of class they should have a BIG TIME problem with this as well.  If they don't, it's time to find a new club.  That one isn't worth belonging to.  They should be putting some big time heat on this jerk basically making him feel unwelcome to ever come back.  Personally I think he should be banned from the club permanently.

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Wow,...

I'll say this,...you handled it well,lol.  I know a few girls who would have not only sent his butt in the water but good lluck trying to get back in the boat!!

RW has straight to the point advice right there.

Definitely try not to let it discourage you, I think that the fishing community in general is a very giving, helpful society.  You met the bad apple, unfortunately.  I personally know guys that would go out of their way to help you out, knowing the additional obstacles that women face.  Extra courteous about bathroom trips, making sure you know to just speak up if anything is needed, etc.  Not saying that women need special care or anything but a little courtesy goes a long way.  Heck, she may have friends and if they hear you're a female friendly club,....more members.  Either way, when fishing at a competitive level, you are the ambassadors of the sport.  All actions should reflect that.  I say BAN the guy!

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Fiirst off I would like to say I am very sorry for what this jerk put you through on the water. I agree that roadwarrier has some great advice as do a few others in this thread. I also agree that you should tell your husband as well. You did nothing wrong at all and it sounds like you handled your self very well. I must admit you probably handled it much better than I would have. I would suggest that the next time you talk to the club president that you ask him "What he IS going to do?" not "IF he is going to do something". Next time you run into this bozo tell him what he did was inappropriate and unacceptable and your not going to allow him to ever put you in this position again. If he cannot see things your way I suggest since he is a family man himself perhaps a phone call to his wife would help. I am sure that she could persuade him to see things your way.  ;D

Good luck at your next tournament.

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I like the call to the wife idea  ;D   Any married man that would do this once will certainly do it again.  

Sorry to hear about what happened to you, that is unacceptable.

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I'm sorry to hear of your experience.  What a way to take a great moment and ruin it for you!  He is a jerk.  I hope this never happens again.  Take care and keep fishin'

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Out of line, inappropriate, and likely criminal.

It must be delt with effectively and swiftly.  If he believes he got away with one he will do it again---maybe not to you, but to another.  And if he does it again it may be worse.

Predators advance and progress in what they do.  This probably isn't the first time he has done something inappropriate.

A criminal complaint may not lead to anything, but it would be on record for future incidents.  Or, this may not be the first time a complaint has been filed and your information may help move things forward.

Good luck.

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Congrats on catching that PB during the tournament!

Problem is, it would be her word against his with no proof other than he said, she said. Unless there are other complaints that have been generated maybe through his work or other avenues of social life.

There maybe a co-worker who has encountered his lude behavior to in the past that won't come foward because of the same issue, no proof. By all means, your husband should be in the know.

You could always have the TD pair you again and have a small tape recorder on. Tell him last time ya'll fished together, you felt uncomfortable with the way he touched you and why did he do it. Tell him theres a big difference in a swat which is inappropraite also, but to rub it after that was way out of bounds.

     Ask him, "what if I told my husband about it? See what he has to say. A recording is not valid in the criminal court of law unless you have warrant or tell the party up front that the converstion is being recorded, but that tape could be played to his wife and fellow friends and that could be just as worse over the years.

Since its your word against his, I'd set him up.

Good luck.

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Look up the word "stupid" in the dictionary and you will see his picture.

Maybe a nice talk with him after your next meeting would be appropriate.

And please call his wife although she may be as dumb as him and take up for him against you.  But usually one lady will listen to the other lady.

And are there any other guys in your club who can warn him that if he does that in the future he is out of the club? Just wondering.

If I was you and he did that to me I would have thrown his fanny out of the boat, even if I had to grab him between the legs to do it.

You will also see his photo next the definition of "jerk" in any dictionary.

So sorry that happened.  Keep on fishing.

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Stupid people are my least favorite thing about fishing....I myself have had some bad experience with idiots on the lakes I fish... Some things I have had to deal with....

People catching bluegills and using them as bait in lakes where its illegal...then keeping the bass they catch with them(which is also illegal in that lake)...

A couple kids throwing out floating pieces of bread on trebble hooks to catch ducks...

Another couple of kids who were attempting to spear fish for bass...

An idiot who was shooting ducks with an air soft gun.

And now the worst one of them all... When I was a child (about 12 years old) who first started fishing an older boy probably around 16-17 years old came by on a skate board grabbed my tackle box that was on the ground about 10 feet from me and ran off with it.  The nice thing was I got a good look at him so I could describe him well. I told my parents and they called the police who eventually caught the thief...after about a couple months...

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You really should have hit him in the nads with the butt end of the net. Then when he asked what that was for hit him again in the face with it. I think that qualifies as sexual harassment and is criminal and you need no witnesses. File charges, you don't need a witness to mess with his life in court. You could also tell hubby since you have done nothing wrong. And hopefully your man will go smack the sh-t ot of him like he deserves. Sounds like a no good peice of sh-t to me. You are in the right and definitely deserve the respect of any angler. have him arrested.

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Thanks for all the support, guys..

I followed up with our Ricky, our pres - he has actually suspended the guy and many of the guys in our club have had words with him.  I guess he has said inappropriate things to them about me and they had told him to cut it out, but  thought he was harmless.  

I am not going to let it discourage me though - something good came out of all of this...I DID talk to my husband, who got VERY upset..then calmed down and talked to Ricky.

Anyway,  he said he's going to make up the difference so I would have my boat by the summer!!!! YEAH!!!! No fishing off the back for me! (Not that I didn't learn a lot this past yr.)

Also, we are having a special meeting this week to discuss proper ettiqutte in our club.  ;)

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