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Eddie Munster

Murphy's Fishing Laws

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Getting back into fishing and going quite a bit has made me realize there are certain things that can AND will happen to you while fishing.

1. If you see a HUGE LMB cruising (either from shore or the boat) when you reach down to grab one of your rods, you'll find they're all tangled up and will require 10 minutes to seperate them.

2. You cast too far and get hung up in a tree. It will be just out of your reach (REALLY bad cast) and the line will break off. The lure will hang there swaying slowly, all the while mocking you and your feeble casting skills.

3. You see a bass boiling on the other side of a cove and since nothing's biting you where you're at, you decide to head over and teach that bass a lesson. No sooner than you get over there and cast a couple when you see several fish boiling at the spot you just were.

4. You start getting hits on your favorite, most expensive lure. Excited, you make the cast of your lifetime only you failed to realize the line got wrapped around the tip. You watch in horror as the line snaps and your high dollar lure goes halfway across the lake, and just when it hits the water, something huge smashes it.

5. You get home from a marathon session of fishing, dream of just showering, drinking a cold beverage when the wife let's you know you now have dinner plans for the evening.

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I'll try to answer these as best as I can.

1.  No need to grab another rod, since that bass is already hooked on the bait I was throwing.

2.  Don't bother fishing for squirrels, they fight poorly, and taste gamely.

3.  You want to chase biting bass, not boiling bass.  The difference is subtle.

4.  That is called chumming.  Highly effective and expensive big fish technique.

5.  Wife?  What is that?  Seriously, if it pays for dinner then I suppose it can't be that bad.  Order wine.

;D

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6. You're running late to get out the door and on the road to the lake. Your buddy is waiting patiently for you to get your gear and get in. You pick up your tackle box only to realize too late, that the lid was open and your tackle is strewn out everywhere. Quickly you clean it up and avoid eye contact with your bud and hop in the car. 10 minutes down the road you have to tell him that either forgot your rods or have to take a leak. Either way, you may be on your last trip with him.

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6.  Your buddy clearly knows nothing about preparation and tackle organization.  He probably can't even cast for squirrels.  You are better off without him.

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JF, I guess you're not getting where I was going with this thread.  ::)

I wasn't posting those issues for you to try and solve. You do know what 'Murphy's Law' is right? Anything that can go wrong, will.

You know like dropping a piece of toast? It ALWAYS lands butter side down. Let me guess though, you're able to catch it while holding a cup of coffee and not spill a drop.  ;)

Just add bad luck that happens to you during fishing trips.

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I know a Murphy, and he stinks at fishing, LOL.

I was trying to be silly.  I didn't realize it was a serious thread.  My funny bone must be broken.  Sorry about that.

Oh, and the toast thing, yeah.  Just skip the toast and eat steak and eggs.

Cheers, and good luck :).

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with the frequency of roughly once a year, I will....

-cast a rod over board

-step on a pair of sunglasses

-Hook myself

-break a trolling motor

-tie on a jig, bite the tag line (or was that the main line) and throw the jig overboard. Never to be seen again.

Oh,.... although fruit and granoila is a healtheir alternative, I'm w/JP,.............. Venison and eggs, leave the toast on the floor. ;):)

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This didn't actually happen to me, but to someone I fished with a while back.  When I'm on a boat I tend to take my shoes/sandals off and walk around the boat bare foot.  I know it's stupid, but I keep an eye out where I'm going and have yet to hook myself on many outings.  

One time though, while out with a friend fishing, he was complaining about his feet being hot.  Me, already bare foot, told him to join me as my feet felt great.  Plus, I could dip them in the water if they got really warm  ;).

Well, he takes his shoes off... then his socks.  He starts to talk about how much better that feels, rolls his seat around, stands up to cast... and of course hooks himself in the bottom of his foot.  Man, that was some bad luck.   :-/

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#2 on my last outing. First from the fish throwing the bait at the bank and the tension on the rod releasing and flinging the lure into the tree. (I got it back) Second was a bad cast trying to get under a low tree.  Brand new lure  >:(  

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#2 also but in my case I got it back by tugging hard on it, then the lure went flying at my face and as I turned to avoid the darn thing one of the hook got embedded on the side of my head :o

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7. If you throw a lure into a tree, lose a PB, pull any number of boneheaded moves and mistakenly curse out loud, a nun and/or pastor will be walking the shoreline within earshot of you. They will shake their head ruefully at you and let you know they're praying for you.

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Sorry, I can't help myself anymore....

7.  Its not the pastor I'm worried about hearing me swear and act immature, ITS MY MOM THAT I'M WORRIED ABOUT.  Yes, I am grown man with kids, and I'm still afraid of mom.  :)

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cool post. :)

4 ways to guarantee you will hook (but not necessarily catch) a big bass:

1.  forget the net (or make sure it is under or tangled in something).

2.  forget the camera.

3.  forget the scale.

4.  forget spare batteries for the camera or the scale.

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Go out and start the morning by hooking and landing 20 decent fish in a row. The 21st, of course is huge, and he shakes the hook.

Take the camera, and you don't catch anything picture worthy.

Leave the camera, and you have a banner day full of slam-pigs.

Bring the camera, have a day full of slam-pigs, then realize you forgot you had the camera the whole time and you didn't get a single shot.

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The best two days of fishing is the day before your get to the lake and the day after you leave.

When you enter a tournament the instant you lay your entry fee on the table ¾ of your honey holes dry up.

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You decide to use one of your favorite lures and you remembered you left it on the table at your house along with the other stuff you decided not to take.

Your rope comes unbuttoned from the dock and your boat floats away.

You forget to put the plug in the boat and it starts to sink.

You forget the net or you cannot find it when you are trying to land that lunker or you can't get to it as it is at the other end of the boat.

You cut the main line and not the tag end of the line and watch your bait slide into the wild blue depths.

You see a bass.  She is just sitting there. A big moma, too.  So you grab your favorite plastic set up and go to cast, hit the windshield and get the backlash of the century.

Or, same as above, but your rods are all tangled by that darn drop shot rig that you forgot to secure.

You see a nice fish and start to go slowly and quietly towards her when your co-angler jumps from the back of the boat to the front to see what you see and the noise scares the fish away.

Same as above but you have that beauty by the boat, getting ready to net her, when your companion jumps down with the net from the back of the boat and makes a lot of noise and the fish breaks off.

You are watching the shoreline and not where you are going and you hit a mud flat.  You have to use your push pole to get out.

You are having a great time in the creek, not noticing the tide going out, and you have to paddle and push pole yourself back to the river.

Have these things happened to me?  Yes.  And I had to swim out to get my boat.  ;D

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One more, Eddie.

You make plans to go fishing one day next week.

You clear your schedule; work late to get caught up at work; you buy the soft drinks, ice and a nice foot long roast beef sandwhich from Subway for lunch, you pick up some Snickers bars, you get all of your equipment ready, gas up the boat and check the oil, make sure you have all required safety equipment on the boat, double check with your partner to make sure he is OK, get permission from wife, get all gear ready to go and you store it in the boat and back of SUV....

and then a cold front comes through the night before.

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I just remembered these:

Getting boat checked out for fishing tournament the next day and found trolling motor broken.  Cancelled tournament.

Motor started beautifully at home before left for lake.  Motor battery died when launched the boat and had to spend $75 for another one at the ramp.

Friend ignored motor running hot during a tournament and continued to run it.  Motor seized and he now has to get new motor. Got towed back to the ramp.

Friend's partner smelled smoke. Friend said "no problem" as it was probably just some fumes from motor.  Nope. All electrical wires burned and he had to get towed back to the ramp.

Murphy's Law rules!  :)

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You carry a ton of jigs, you pick one, make a beutiful cast, the moment the bait touches the bottom a behemoth big momma grabs it, you "set" the hook the fish jumps and spits the jig right on your face, there you are with the I don't understand face wonderin ' what went wrong ( heck you 've done it before so many times and came out triumphant ), inspecting the bait you realize that out of a ton of jigs with razor sharp hooks you picked the only one with a dull hook.  ::)

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cool post. :)

4 ways to guarantee you will hook (but not necessarily catch) a big bass:

1. forget the net (or make sure it is under or tangled in something).

2. forget the camera.

3. forget the scale.

4. forget spare batteries for the camera or the scale.

Thanks Paul.

Nice additions guys; Sam those were awesome.

8. If you take one of your kids fishing with you, forget about fishing yourself. As soon as you cast they'll either......get a snag, hook a fish (woot!) or ask you to change their lures.

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cool post. :)

8. If you take one of your kids fishing with you, forget about fishing yourself. As soon as you cast they'll either......get a snag, hook a fish (woot!) or ask you to change their lures.

I can really agree with #8, boy can I.

Later, :)

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You spend a week planning a REALLY good fishing trip. Your friend that lives 2 hours away is coming over the night before to stay at your place so you can get an early start. Check the rods and reels over several times. Go to the store several times to make sure you have enough tackle, line, hooks, etc. Take the boat into town to fuel up the truck and the boat. Charge the batteries, check the tires, make sure all the lights are in working order, bilge pump, livewell pump and pre-start the engine.

EVERYTHING IS PERFECT.

Wake up early, put a pot of coffee in the thermos and your on the road to your favorite lake in the middle of nowhere.

Pull up to the ramp, pull the straps and................................

The ranger shows up from nowhere at 5:30 AM and wants to give you a safety inspection. I never saw one there before or since.

Everything works EXCEPT THE FIRE EXTINGUISHER. Where does a guy get a fire extinguisher at 5:30 in the morning far from the nearest town.

Murphy was in full force that day.

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You spend a week planning a REALLY good fishing trip. Your friend that lives 2 hours away is coming over the night before to stay at your place so you can get an early start. Check the rods and reels over several times. Go to the store several times to make sure you have enough tackle, line, hooks, etc. Take the boat into town to fuel up the truck and the boat. Charge the batteries, check the tires, make sure all the lights are in working order, bilge pump, livewell pump and pre-start the engine.

EVERYTHING IS PERFECT.

Wake up early, put a pot of coffee in the thermos and your on the road to your favorite lake in the middle of nowhere.

Pull up to the ramp, pull the straps and................................

The ranger shows up from nowhere at 5:30 AM and wants to give you a safety inspection. I never saw one there before or since.

Everything works EXCEPT THE FIRE EXTINGUISHER. Where does a guy get a fire extinguisher at 5:30 in the morning far from the nearest town.

Murphy was in full force that day.

Ouch!

Man I mean no disrespect but both of you DID get kitchen passes before you planned this right? Sounds like the work of a jealous wife.  ;)

9. When the weather man said 20% chance of thunderstorms he meant 20% all day but it's really 100% once you think you're getting that boat out on the lake. And it won't start until you launch.  :'(

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