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Shocked and Saddened

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  • Super User

For years I coached baseball in rec, travel, and middle school ball and I got to know a ton of kids and their families. There was another guy who was also a single dad who was my assistant coach most seasons and we became friends and our sons became friends.

 

We all went camping and fishing together throughout the year and enjoyed each other's company. I moved away from that part of SC 5 years ago and we drifted apart.

 

Two days ago I received a text from my ex wife with a link to an article. His son is now on the run from the police for attempted murder. The story is he fired a gun at an occupied vehicle and then fled. Thankfully, no one was injured. There was just damage to the car.

 

This kid is 18 now, but I knew him as a happy, goofy kid and a pretty good ballplayer. His father is a good man. and taught his son right from wrong.  I could never imagine this coming.

 

I reached out to his dad the other day offering my support and told him if the media gets to him or when things die down he can come out and stay at my house or hotel for a few days to try and decompress. He didn't say much except that his son is innocent, but the last two years have been difficult. I can relate, because my son has had some mental health difficulties for more than a few years now.

 

It has me thinking that there are so many outside influences today like social media and instant communication along with the psychological damage done by lack of socialization during COVID that kids today face far greater challenges than I ever faced. In today's world, this constant bombardment of outside influences and increased peer pressure, anonymity, and bullying (for lack of a better term) due to social media are taking an incredible toll on our children.

 

As mature adults, our brains are better equipped to rationalize the good from the bad and blow off ridiculous people. But studies show that people don't achieve rationalization and critical thinking skills until they are in their 20's. The pressure on today's kids is immense and we see that with increased violence, suicides, self harm, and more.

 

I guess what I'm getting at is that in today's society, kids can be raised by great parents and instill a solid values system, but more and more kids seem to be making poor decisions.

  • Super User

I can say even as an adult social media got to me. Keeping up with the jones. Look at those people doing this aren’t they lucky. I do not use any of it but this bass fishing forum. I do want to start an Instagram for my dog. I just never do because it’s “giving in”. I was very lucky to be at the beginning of social media in my high school years. 

 

I hope this guy is innocent. It could very well be true it could very well be not. I am glad no one was injured.  At least that will not have to weigh on this kids soul and family’s mind. 

  • Global Moderator

You’re a good man @Koz

By reaching out to someone you haven’t had contact with for 5 yrs but now because of a private family issue says a lot about you. 

I’m sure that man is blaming himself on some level but at some point people of all ages must take responsibility for what they do and don’t do. 
 

It’s never always someone else’s fault or the “pressure” of what they’re exposed to. 
 

Glad no one was hurt and hope everything works out not only for the kid but also his family. 

 

 

 

 

 

Mike

 

@Koz, like @Mike L said, you are a good man for reaching out to an old friend. Know matter how this turns out, it's not mom and dads fault or doing. The responsibility lies solely with the son. In my 30+ year law enforcement career, I can't count the number of kids hauled to jail that were raised by good men and women. Heck, sometimes there would be other siblings that were exemplary people. You just never know what makes a kid snap; easy money, drugs, the "wrong crowd", mental illness? One of the Officers under my supervision has a kid in the penitentiary right now, been in and out since high school. His daughter is an RN. You just never know. 

  • Super User
17 hours ago, Koz said:

I guess what I'm getting at is that in today's society, kids can be raised by great parents and instill a solid values system, but more and more kids seem to be making poor decisions.

Kids, who were raised by good parents, and have made poor decisions is nothing new. It’s been happening for thousands of years. 

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