frogtog

DAD AT THE MALL I took my dad to the mall the other day to buy some new shoes. We decided to grab a bite at the food court I noticed he was watching a teenager sitting next to him. The teenager had spiked hair in all different colors: green, red, orange, and blue. My dad kept staring at him. The teenager would look and find him staring every time.When the teenager had enough, he sarcastically asked, "What's the matter old man, never done anything wild in your life?" Knowing my Dad, I quickly swallowed my food so that I would not choke on his response; knowing he would have a good one. And in classic style he did not bat an eye in his response, "Got drunk once and had sax with a peacock. I was just wondering if you were my son." ;D

Let me know when you figure out what the lite is for.

Ok It's almost Christmas and time will be limited for me. So I just wanted to let you know that it has been almost a year since I joined BR and I have really enjoyed talking to yall and doing some learning also. Not in my wildest dreams would I thought that I would be sitting in front of a computer carrying on a conversation. I hope some where along the way I have made some friends and maybe made someone laugh. So from me and my family to yours we wish you a Merry Christmas. Jimmy

I new dad gum well the first time I seen y'all there was something wrong with you. ( Elf's ) ;D

I use to have that problem, I ended up having to run a fan or a machine I have beside my bed that sounds like the ocean. These help a whole lot. But I can tell you the older you get the easier it gets to go to bed. ;D I'm talking 8 o'clock and you are out of there. Ain't no need to even think about Monday night football, because it will be the next day before you know who won the game

Frogtog, its for deer hunting, the greatest thing I have ever used for pelvic bones and the sternum. Although I have used it for pruning twigs and branches in the bow stand. I will have it on my belt in the morning. I use my chain saw to cut the bones in deer. ;D

I think that is what Glen's problem is to. ;D

Thanks Pond Hopper, I got my Gerber Saw today. That is some thing I can really use. In fact I can see myself getting into trouble with it. ;D As much pruning as I have to do this will come in handy. You are a great shopper. Thank You and Merry Christmas.

Coselle and Ali were they a pair or what! Coselle would be pulling for who ever was winning the fight. ;D Then there is this guy on Basketball that does the Baaa Bee can't stand him, I will get up and change the channel.

Let me start your day off with a laugh, hope your day is a good one!!!! >> A BLONDE'S YEAR IN REVIEW >> >> JANUARY: >> Took new scarf back to store because it was too tight. >> >> FEBRUARY: >> Fired from pharmacy job for failing to print labels..... >> Helllloooo!!!.......bottles won't fit in printer !!! >> >> MARCH: >> Got really excited.....finished jigsaw puzzle in 6 months..... box >> said '2-4 years!' >> >> APRIL: >> Trapped on escalator for hours .... power went out!!! >> >> MAY: >> Tried to make Kool-Aid.....wrong instructions....8 cups of >> water won't fit into those little packets!!! >> >> JUNE: >> Tried to go water skiing.......couldn't find a lake with a slope. >> >> JULY: >> Lost breast stroke swimming competition.....learned later, >> the other swimmers cheated, they used their arms! !! >> >> AUGUST: >> Got locked out of my car in rain storm..... car swamped because >> soft-top was open. >> >> SEPTEMBER: >> The capital of California is 'C'.....isn't it??? >> >> OCTOBER: >> Hate M & M's.....they are so hard to peel. >> >> NOVEMBER: >> Baked turkey for 4 1/2 days .. instructions said 1 hour per pound >> and I weigh 108!! >> >> DECEMBER: >> Couldn't call 911 . 'duh'.....there's no 'eleven' button on the >> stupid phone!!! >> >> >> ***THE BEST BLONDE JOKE OF THE YEAR - SO FAR >> >> A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive blonde >> female neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the >> mailbox. >> >> She opened it then slammed it shut and stormed back in the >> house. >> >> A little later she came out of her house again went to the mail box >> and again,opened it, slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into >> the house she went. >> >> As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came out >> again, marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed it >> closed harder than ever. >> >> Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, 'Is something wrong?' >> >> To which she replied, 'There certainly is!' >> >> (Are you ready? This is a beauty...) >> >> MY STUPID COMPUTER KEEPS SAYING, "YOU'VE GOT MAIL!"

All my life I have been a highly competitive person. I never was all that good at sports. So I started hunting and fishing, the hunting got kind of easy for me, so I pretty much gave it up. So I started bass fishing in the mid 70's and got to where I could win a club tournament every now and then. I left that behind and started fishing tournaments for money. There is nothing I love as good as walking up to the weigh- in with a nice bag of fish. And God knows it's not about the money. I have spent 10 times or better than I will ever win. And I think what helps me the most is having a Darn good partner. You could look half your life and not find a partner like I have. He is always on time, never worry about entry fees, always steps up when I'm having a bad day and best of all we curse each other out all day ;D Worst part of it is my partner is getting a little older now and can't go like he use to so I have to take'm on by myself sometimes. And another thing is you have got to have a good wife and family to tournament fish, and I have both. No I wouldn't take any thing for my tournament fishing, Just hope Heaven has some good lakes.

Old time favorit ( Miracle On 54th Street )

I had one jump on my PC Saturday night. This virus was named Down Loader. My whole system went into Alert status. This is the first time this has ever happened to me, when it showed the name of the virus. My PC must be setup right because it deleted it or something.

OLD FRIENDS: Two elderly ladies had been friends for many decades. Over the years, they had shared all kinds of activities and adventures. Lately, their activities had been limited to meeting a few times a week to play cards. One day, they were playing cards when one looked at the other and said , 'Now don't get mad at me. I know we've been friends for a long time, but I just can't think of your name! I've thought and thought, but I can't remember it. Please tell me what your name is.' Her friend glared at her. For at least three minutes she just stared and glared at her. Finally she said, 'How soon do you need to know?' _____________________________________________________ LOST IN THE DARNEDEST PLACES An elderly Floridian called 911 on her cell phone to report that her car has been broken into. She is hysterical as she explains her situation to the dispatcher: 'They've stolen the stereo, the steering wheel, the brake pedal and even the accelerator!' she cried. The dispatcher said, 'Stay calm. An officer is on the way.' A few minutes later, the officer radios in. 'Disregard.' He says. 'She got in the back-seat by mistake.' ______________________________________________________ FAMILY Three sisters, ages 92, 94 and 96, live in a house together. One night the 96-year-old draws a bath. She puts her foot in and pauses. She yells to the other sisters, 'Was I getting in or out of the bath?' The 94-year-old yells back, 'I don't know. I'll come up and see.' She starts up the stairs and pauses 'Was I going up the stairs or down?' The 92-year-old is sitting at the kitchen table having tea, listening to her sisters. She shakes her head and says, 'I sure hope I never get that forgetful, knock on wood.' She then yells, 'I'll come up and help both of you as soon as I see who's at the door.' ______________________________________________________ 'I CAN HEAR JUST FINE!' Three retirees, each with a hearing loss, were playing golf one fine March day. One remarked to the other, 'Windy, isn't it?' 'No,' the second man replied, 'it's Thursday.' And the third man chimed in, 'So am I. Let's have a beer.' __________________________________________ ____ LITTLE LADY A little old lady was running up and down the halls in a nursing home. As she walked, she would flip up the hem of her nightgown and say 'Supersex!' She walked up to an elderly man in a wheelchair. Flipping her gown at him, she said, 'Supersex!' He sat silently for a moment or two and finally answered, 'I'll take the soup.' _____________________________________________________ SENIOR DRIVING As a senior citizen was driving down the freeway, his car phone rang. Answering, he heard his wife's voice urgently warning him, 'Herman, I just heard on the news that there's a car going the wrong way on Interstate 77. Please be careful!' 'Heck,' said Herman, 'It's not just one car! It's hundreds of them!' ______________________________________________________ DRIVING Two elderly women were out driving in a large car. Both could barely see over the dashboard. As they were cruising along, they came to an intersection. The stoplight was red, but they just went on through. The woman in the passenger seat thought to herself 'I must be losing it. I could have sworn we just went through a red light.' After a few more minutes, they came to another intersection and the light was red again. Again, they went right through. The woman in the passenger seat was almost sure that the light had been red but was really concerned that she was losing it. She was getting nervous. At the next intersection, sure enough, the light was red and they went on through. So, she turned to the other woman and said, 'Mildred, did you know that we just ran through three r ed lights in a row? You could have killed us both!' Mildred turned to her and said, 'Oh, crap, am I driving?' TELL ME THIS WON'T HAPPEN TO US !!!!

Old Brother Where Art Thou. I have watched this movie 57 times. I almost know it by heart.

I down loaded it, but I can't find my favorites to click on? You are right it does seem to be faster.

Someone tell me how to get it and I'll try it.

Come on Glen, this ain't political, It's American History. ;D

I am so sorry. You guy's just haven't been reading unless you have read Patrich F. Mcmanus ( Last Name Might Be Spelt wrong ) I have read some of his books and laughed till I cried, especially ( The Night The Bear Ate Gumball ) It might just be me and my since of humor, but this guy is the best if you like to laugh. He use to write for Outdoor Life.

He didn't want you to know to much.

Looks like I need to get my weapons of mash destruction out and go back to practicing. Might need to be purchasing some new stuff too. :-/

Yep thats the one's they are looking for.

What do you mean by wraps?

Glad you are Ok LM, those ice storms are tough. So tell me, who did you talk to while the power was out? I noticed it was getting mighty quite around here. Still glad that your are ok.

A lot of people don't like George but he jumped right into the hornets nest over there. I have noticed that there hasn't been to many bombing over here lately either. I guess they are sitting back waiting for one of those other bozo's to get in office.