From ESPN callers:

 

Chuck Norris has a bear skin rug.  The bear isn't dead,  it's just afraid to move.

 

Chuck Norris is the reason Waldo is hiding.

 

When Chuck Norris goes swimming,  he doesn't get wet,  the water gets Chuck Norris.

 

When Alexander Graham Bell invented the telephone,  he had three missed calls from Chuck Norris.

 

Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number,  you pick up the wrong call.

Chuck Norris made Journey stop believing

 

Chuck Norris makes webbles fall down

 

Allen

go to google, type in "where is chuck norris" and click I'm feeling lucky.

Chuck Norris doesn't always fish braid but when he does he cuts it with his stubble.

Chuck Norris was actually ran out of a Chinese restaurant by its ladle wielding owner. 

Mosquitos don't bite him out of pure respect.

Chuck Norris can empty a swimming pool with a fork... While it's raining.

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Got to be the ugliest guy I have ever seen in my live.........he did ridie off in the sunsets with Jessica Alba in Machete.

Chuck norris doesnt age

Chuck norris doesnt age

The rest of the world gets younger. That's how you have to finish that.

Chick Norris died 20 years ago. Death is just to afraid to tell him.

Chuck noriss and lance armstrong got into who had the most balls contest... chuck norris won by 12