DitchPanda

First off let me apologize for this rant I will never understand why people play games at my age. Basically what happened was I got lead on by a woman I work with. Back in March we started hanging out after talking daily for about a month. We had a very good time together and always have good connection and deep conversation. She told me I was a great, sweet guy and that she loved me and we should be together. Then when I said ok well I really like you alot lets do this she said I want to but I can't because there's another guy. A few weeks later she got ticked at me and when I said well if its easier maybe we should go back to being just work friends she said thats for the best because I "took what she said out of context" and all this ever was for her is friendship. I thought this kind of s#$% waa supposed to stop by 20 not keep going at 43. Absolutely insane. Zero accountability for her words and actions...its weak and pathetic.

Sorry for your loss man, never easy to deal with. I have 2 cats: sully is 10 and Casper (he's albino) is 4....I know one day ill have to do what's necessary and it's gonna be tough but in the end its the right thing if they are suffering.

Appreciate all the support guys

Got 29lbs to go and ill be at my first target weight

Thanks for all the advice a words of encouragement... Its greatly appreciated. I've already got a buddies girlfriend trying to set me up but I'm not ready for that yet. Gonna take my time, fish , get to know myself again, focus on my health and hang out with friends. When something is supposed to happen ill know and be ready.

So as many of you know I've been taking my health more seriously and I'm happy to report I've lost 33lbs and my blood pressure has dropped significantly. Also on a positive front I've applied for a new job in my hometown, I'm not saying ill get it but it's an opportunity I couldn't at least try for. Now for the negative, my lady and I called it quits a while back after 14.5 years. Nothing nasty on either side...no abuse or cheating.....just doesn't work anymore. So here I am creeping up on 43 and I'm single for the first time in almost 20 years as there was almost no lag between my last two relationships. Just curious to see what's next!

Thank you all for the responses...I think I may actually got the kettle bell route

So the past few months I've been eating better and doing some cardio, my back and knee pain is gone and I've lost about 25lbs. So far all I've done for cardio is walking but then I started reading about rucking and I've heard its a good way to strengthen your shoulders, lower back and core while walking. Anybody have experience? Suggestions on how much weight? Rucksack or vest?

Probably my age speaking here but I'm going new school: No country for old men and Hell or high water.

Thanks for the insight and well wishes...I'm committed to this, I'm the only one who can change this

So over the years I've struggled with maintaining my weight and overall health and now at 42 its starting to catch up with me---i was pre diabetic and also diagnosed with prostatitis, those two things were enough to say hey lazy a## time to do something. My biggest problem has been discipline and self control...I have a hard time staying focused on a diet exercise plan because to me saying oh I'm on a diet right now sounds so temporary. This time instead I'm focusing on a lifestyle change and for the past few months I've just been making better food and drink choices and its been easier than I thought. What I've eliminated: Processed carbs- sodas, chips, crappy breads, cereal, pasta etc. Caffeine- not because its really that bad but I'm naturally pretty high energy and any amount messed with my sleep. What I've cut back on: salt, red meat, homemade sweets- 1 or 2 cookies or equivalent a week instead of several 5 days a week, butter and other high fat dairy like Cheddar cheese and cream cheese, alcohol- its a pretty big inflammatory so since my prostatitis diagnosis I've had zero and I'm determined when I go back to imbibing I'm gonna cut back from what I was consuming which was already cut back significantly for the past 18 months. What I've added or increased: cardio- namely brisk walking which is good for mental health, heart health and inflammation, fruits- veggies- whole grains- healthy dairy, leaner protein sources- chicken, fish, shrimp,Greek yogurt for protein and gut health, Water- I was not drinking enough and I don't care how cliche it is proper hydration is extremely important for, well everything, Time for personal reflection- never done much of this but it helps unclutter my thoughts and add perspective. What I've experienced: Improved symptoms with my prostate,lower blood pressure, better more consistent bowel movements, energy is more consistent thru the day, lower back and knee pain are gone for the first time in years, regained some of my flexibility, clarity of thoughts leading to better attitude control and overall better mood. Last thing I've noticed\experienced is since eliminating alot of junk is that I don't really miss it, in fact it was easier than I thought and its not even an option I'd consider at this point, really doesn't enter my mind. What's my plan: Continue to focus on eating and walking which should be easy now that I'm not treating it as something I'm doing for now but it is what I'm doing going forward. At some point I will incorporate some strength training to maintain my current muscle mass. With added mental clarity now realizing what's really important I will focus on strengthening my relationships, especially the one with my wife which we both agree that we have been neglecting. What's my goal: overall I'm just looking to be better-- I'd like to get back to the weight I was when I got together with my wife. When I started this about 8 weeks ago I was 287lbs--- right now I'm at 270---end goal would be 215----but honestly the number isn't as important as how I feel. I'm really just aiming for better sleep, less aches and pains, clarity to add to better performance and decision making and most importantly a stronger relationship with my wife. I guess the ultimate goal then would be more daily enjoyment and overall better quality of life. I'd say this is going to be a long road but I feel like that is a trap in the same way as calling something a diet is. This is not thing that I'm doing, this is the thing I'm doing forever. There will be challenges and setbacks but im determined to stay flexible, diligent and disciplined...I'm doing this.

Whoops! Ribeye ...my fault. Not sure why the autocorrect on my Kindle was set on Cannibal mode.

We are having my family Christmas at my sisters today so we are having deviled eggs, potato salad and my niece is in Home economics or the equivalent \whatever its called nowadays so she's making club sandwiches. Traditionally we would do seafood on new years Eve growing up...last night me and the wife stayed home and had charcoal grilled Roberts ( unseasonably warm here) and sushi from a local spot.

Its been a strange winter here....we had cold temps early followed by some record highs then we got 2\3rds of our winter average allotment of snow in like 8 days then back and forth between unseasonably warm and bitter cold (-30 windchill). Work has been pretty rough so I haven't had much time to get out- had several 60ish hour weeks- in fact I haven't been on the ice yet this year or fishing in any form for probably 6 weeks. So I'm getting itchy and honestly kinda cranky.

My plant manager picked me up a bottle of the Jack Daniels heritage toasted single barrel so I popped it tonight...its very good. Dessert forward pour...perfect after a big ribeye!

Not much to say that hasn't already been said....he was a wealth of knowledge and from what I could tell a good human...he will be missed and my heart goes out to his loved ones.

Having a JTS Brown BIB old fashioned and watching Mad Men. Its decent for $18 but I prefer Evan Williams BIB for the price.

I suppose you could say the same about drinking.

Back.to the mid 90s when I was a preteen ....would love to go night cat fishing with my dad and grandpa again.

Well everything here is froze shut but we've only got like 3-4in of ice with a ton of snow, water and slush sitting on top. So your boat ride actually sounds great to me.

Got another 6in of snow yesterday we are now at 14in in a week. Last winter we had like 16 total all winter. Normal winter totals is around 31 for us so we are almost have way there and its December 7th.

I've fished the same 2 old gravel pits for 25 years. Do I truly know them? Ill just say I feel pretty confident when I go out. That said we get flooding often and the river gets in and does all kinds of stuff I.E deposits silt, relocates brush piles, deposits new piles. Probably the reason I keep fishing these same 2 little bodies of water is they are familiar enough for comfort but change enough to keep me invested. Plus we've got a wide variety of species available in them...white bass, largemouth, smallmouth, bluegill, crappie, walleye and channel cats are all common catchs.

Its crazy how much tackle I have ....basically all I threw this year was a Ned rig and a small popper. Kinda the same for panfish...I've got tons of plastics, spoons and mini crank baits and this year I caught thousands of bluegill and crappie, 90% of them were on a Berkley powerbait may fly on an ice fishing jig under a rocket bobber.

Goals for 2026: Spend more time panfishing and catfishing--really wanna target some yellow perch and yellow bass as I don't get the chance often Get out with my dad more often Try and see if I can get my lady back into fishing ....she is my preferred fishing buddy I'd like to catch at least 1 largemouth 5+lbs did not accomplish that this year

Getting together with a couple buddies to have a boys night shortly ....bringing a Michters single barrel rye and a lagavulin 8 because my buddy Matt has never had peated scotch. Got one buddy a knob creek 9 and the other one a knob creek 7 rye....early Christmas presents. Recently I purchased a Bush mills Black Bush and a Bunnahabhain 12...like them both alot. Also picked up a Lagavulin 16 Wednesday night, haven't opened it yet but I've had it before and its fantastic in my opinion.