Sleep? There'll be enough time for that when your dead

If you keep that, you'll always have it.

In "Ghost", Demi Moore asks Patrick Swayze why he kept an ugly chair when they moved to a new apartment.

Moore: "it doesn't go with anything!"

Swayze: (sitting in the offensive chair) "it goes with me"

The easiest way to mislead someone is to tell them the truth 

vincit omnia veritas

truth conquers all things. Or...

in vino veritas

in wine there is truth. lol..

It's real easy, anyone can do it.

I used to be schizophrenic, but we`re OK now

 

I respect your opinion, I just don`t want to hear it

 

If your not the lead dog, the view never changes

 

All I want is a little more than I`ll ever get

 

Gun control means using both hands

 

If I`d shot her when I wanted to , I`d be out by now

 

If all else fails , lower your standards

 

[all are stickers on my  mc helmet]

Guaranteed for life

 

just three easy payments

One size fits all.

Complete this one!

Put me on the cover

Free sample -- just have your credit card ready.

.

It'll feel better when it quits hurting.

.

Anyone know what I'm looking for?

.

This might sting a little, hold him down.

From Dazed and Confused: (My favorite movie ever!)

 

1. All I'm saying is that if I ever start referring to these as the best years of my life - remind me to kill myself.

2. I love those redheads!

3. That's what I love about these high school girls, man. I get older, they stay the same age.

4. All right, all right, all right.

Just $19.15 + shipping  and handling

 

We`re number One

 

Guaranteed for life.

 

#2 first place loser

 

I just lost a hog

I watched Princess Bride the other day. That movie is FULL of one liners.

 

Anybody want a peanut?

 

That would put a damper on our relationship.

 

You seem like a decent fellow. I hate to kill you.

 

YOU seem like a decent fellow. I hate to die.

My sixth grade teacher Otis Miles when we would have a battle of wills...... "on MacDuff and woe be to he who cries enough..."

Another of his favorites was "Boy you should be happy because ignorance is bliss."

And finally "Don't make me get George" George was his paddle!

From the movie Unforgiven

 

Gene Hackman- "You sir are a cowardly sum b%tch, you just shot an unarmed man!"

 

Clint Eastwood- "Well he should have armed himself"

 

Bumper sticker on my last Ranger (in my avatar)

"The more people I meet, the more I like my dog"

Due to the elevated price of ammo,

do not bank on a warning shot!

High school girlfriends mom told me, ----- "the best birth control is an asprin held firmly between the knees"

You were my second choice.

Some people are just like 'Slinkies'. 

They're really not good for anything, but when you push them down the stairs,

they bring a smile to your face.

 

Roger

If I had known I was going to live this long, I would have taken better care of myself.

 

Just sign on the dotted line kid

 

Old fishermen never die,they just smell that way.

 

You will never see  Brinks truck following a hearse

 

I got a hot tip for ya

If I agreed with you we'd both be wrong.

 

The sole purpose of a child's middle name, is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.

 

The voices in my head may not be real, but they have some good ideas.

 

A-Jay

 

If I agreed with you we'd both be wrong.

 

The sole purpose of a child's middle name, is so he can tell when he's really in trouble.

 

The voices in my head may not be real, but they have some good ideas.

 

A-Jay

 

 

If I agreed with the above, we'd both be right

 

Roger

Cause I said so!

There are three kinds of men. The one that learns by reading. The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence for themselves.

Will Rogers