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Have a little issue here


kingmotorboat

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I'm sure that your friend has his own version of this story. Hard to imagine him getting angry with you over catching a few fish. Maybe it's just the way he expresses himself and you're just assuming otherwise? Maybe there's major issues somewhere else in his life and he's just taking it out on you while fishing? In any case, my best advise is to get him away from fishing altogether and go somewhere different, maybe to a place to have a cup of coffee or even a beer, sit down with him and bring up how you feel about this. Maybe you guys can come to terms and move on. Worth trying, imho. I've seen many friendships wiped out over simple misunderstandings. 

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If he is a friend and not only a fishing budy sit down with him and couple of beers, ask him what his ....... problem is. 

If its just a random guy just get rid of him. fishing is not worth dealing with someone like that. 

 

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I'm from East TN, living in southern AR now, 9 miles from the LA state line. The guy doesn't run a Norris Craft does he? I fished a year end tournament on Watts Bar Lake years ago as a back seater. My boater owned a black Norris Craft. He got pretty mad because I was catching them and he wasn't. I even offered him the exact crank I was using, said he'd rather do whatever he was doing. I was different back then. The madder he got, the more I kept my foot on the gas.

You could always go and wade for Smallies. 

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@kingmotorboat always lit up the forum when he came on. Everyone had a smile on their face when we saw him log on and post. His influence was infectious here and none of us will ever be the same with his absence. He had a bright future and it was taken from him...from us."

 

that's what I'll be hearing when my wife watches this episode of snapped and we get interviewed.  

 

Honestly though I've learned that people who fish alone either do it purposely or unintentionally. Ie. they don't want to deal with people...or people don't want to deal with them.

 

Your best bet is to start saving up a little couch money and pick up a kayak or john boat...depending on how big your couch is. The freedom that comes with dictating when/where you fish is worth the price of admission. 

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as i get older, i have learned to surround myself with positive people.  

 

there is no way i would fish with that guy.  he would have dropped me off on a island after i was honest with him after the first episode.  sheriff boat would have to come get me.  hahahh

 

my younger brother throws tantrums if a hunting trip goes bad for him.  like he misses a shot, or blows a stalk.  i dont hunt with him anymore.  i love him to death, but i love myself more..and i dont need the negative vibes.  fishing he is fine.    

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I might go bank fish for a bit so you can solo it for a bit. I really think that’s what ya need right now. You’re my boy but yesterday man you got so distraught over that and it’s happened a few times this year. I hate seeing ya like that. I didn’t ask and that’s on me but I hope everything is good in personal life bro. That’s why I got quiet I didn’t know really what to say
 

that’s the message I sent this morning and have had no reply since 🤷‍♂️. I always wish for people surrounding me to have success. So whatever he’s going through and whatever his future endeavors are I hope he succeeds. Appreciate it guys

48 minutes ago, volzfan59 said:

I'm from East TN, living in southern AR now, 9 miles from the LA state line. The guy doesn't run a Norris Craft does he? I fished a year end tournament on Watts Bar Lake years ago as a back seater. My boater owned a black Norris Craft. He got pretty mad because I was catching them and he wasn't. I even offered him the exact crank I was using, said he'd rather do whatever he was doing. I was different back then. The madder he got, the more I kept my foot on the gas.

You could always go and wade for Smallies. 


no sir. He just started and it’s a little 15 foot fiberglass with a 40

3 hours ago, galyonj said:

I dunno where in east tn you're at, @kingmotorboat, but you need a better class of friend. Cause that one you got right now's bitchmade.


Johnson city

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I've been in this situation before.  Trust me when I tell you that it'll be a lot easier to find someone else to fish with who has a nice boat that you actually enjoy spending time with than it will be to "fix" this guy.  And yeah, I know how hard it is to find new friends when you move to a new area as an adult.  Especially friends who fish and own boats.  But it's nowhere near the amount of time or effort that it would take to coax this man into someone that you feel comfortable being around. 

 

In fact, the better he gets to know you, the more comfortable he'll feel around you, and the more violent and angry he'll become.  Believe it or not, you're seeing the good side of him.  Don't wait until the bad side comes out.  The longer you wait to cut him off, the more dangerous he'll become.  

 

If he were an old friend and you had a lot of history, it might be worth it to talk to him and be patient and help him through his troubles.  But since this isn't the case, doing so would be a bad investment, where the more you put into the relationship, the more he'll take from you.  

 

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My best fishing bud and I are like Gimli and Legolas (he's Gimli though, ugly fool). Counting every catch, the big ones count as two, and the non bass don't count at all. Then it's a restaurant stop afterwards, stinking and all. Get you a friend like that.

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Great advice shared here. Fishing is supposed to be fun and relaxing.Waiting for a powder keg to blow is neither. It's simply not worth the worry. Your fishing partner needs professional help. Get a yak or a small john boat and have no worries. 

 

I can only guess as how he might react when something in life really goes sideways. I would create a lot of distance between him and you. You'll be happier and safer.

 

 

 

 

8 hours ago, Bankc said:

I've been in this situation before.  Trust me when I tell you that it'll be a lot easier to find someone else to fish with who has a nice boat that you actually enjoy spending time with than it will be to "fix" this guy.  And yeah, I know how hard it is to find new friends when you move to a new area as an adult.  Especially friends who fish and own boats.  But it's nowhere near the amount of time or effort that it would take to coax this man into someone that you feel comfortable being around. 

 

In fact, the better he gets to know you, the more comfortable he'll feel around you, and the more violent and angry he'll become.  Believe it or not, you're seeing the good side of him.  Don't wait until the bad side comes out.  The longer you wait to cut him off, the more dangerous he'll become.  

 

If he were an old friend and you had a lot of history, it might be worth it to talk to him and be patient and help him through his troubles.  But since this isn't the case, doing so would be a bad investment, where the more you put into the relationship, the more he'll take from you.  

 

This is soooo spot on.

 

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On 11/13/2023 at 11:12 AM, Functional said:

 

Honestly though I've learned that people who fish alone either do it purposely or unintentionally. Ie. they don't want to deal with people...or people don't want to deal with them.

 

Not always. No one else wants to rise and shine at 3:00 a.m., so I fish alone. Mostly. I do fish with others here and there. However, I mostly prefer fishing alone because I catch more because I'm concentrating rather than coaching. 

 

On 11/13/2023 at 11:53 AM, kingmotorboat said:

I might go bank fish for a bit so you can solo it for a bit. I really think that’s what ya need right now. You’re my boy but yesterday man you got so distraught over that and it’s happened a few times this year. I hate seeing ya like that. I didn’t ask and that’s on me but I hope everything is good in personal life bro. That’s why I got quiet I didn’t know really what to say

 

^This^ is kind.

 

I wouldn't bank fish. If I were you, all the time you spend fishing now, I'd work a second job. Then, as others have suggested, I'd save that money and buy a kayak.

 

Heck, you might not even need to work more. A basic kayak could be found for a couple hundred bucks. I'm not talking about a tricked-out fishing kayak. I'm talking about a basic, old kayak where you set the rod on your lap and go catch bass.

 

Lots of great advice in this thread, but @Bankc's is the best. So far, you've seen this guy at his best. 

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On 11/12/2023 at 4:31 PM, kingmotorboat said:

Guys I moved up to east tn last year. Love it here. Well I’ve been fishing from the back of my new buddy’s boat. Love the guy to death but here’s the problem. Anytime I catch a fish from the back of the boat he gets angry. I mean really angry. Today I caught a good one and he proceeeded to sit on the front deck for 2 hours acting like a two year old. I’ve actually now go to the point where sometimes I don’t even really fish cause he gets irritated when I catch a fish and he doesn’t. He’s new to bass fishing. I’ve been doing it for years and years in south Louisiana. I have tried to educate him and he doesn’t want to listen. It’s actually cost me a few fish this year when he throws his temper tantrum. Being the new guy in town it’s hard and I mean hard to find someone to fish with cause lots of these guys have been together years and I don’t blame them. They’ve built that relationship for years who Am I to come in to change it. Any advice guys? Or anyone in east tn needing a partner?  It’s getting to the point where I can’t even fish from the back of his boat cause he’s already broke a few rods this year being irritated so I just throw random stuff 😬

 

As I'm reading this, I'm waiting to get to the end to hear the punchline. That's how asinine and unbelievable this story sounds. He sounds like a certified nutcase.

 

If I were you, I'd go out with him one last time. And anytime you catch a bass, you act like Michael Iaconelli catching an 8 pounder at the Bassmaster Classic. That's what I'd do. I guess that makes me a little nutty myself. :laugh7:

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23 minutes ago, kingmotorboat said:

He did admit he was wrong though. Takes a lot to admit that 

Perhaps, but it's more likely he's well practiced at apologizing for how he is. I've crossed paths with a few of these types over time and they're often manipulative. Expert at getting back into your good graces if you allow it, until the next time, and you know there will be a next time because there was a first time so easily. Remember the cues and chalk it up to a life's lesson.

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31 minutes ago, PhishLI said:

Perhaps, but it's more likely he's well practiced at apologizing for how he is. I've crossed paths with a few of these types over time and they're often manipulative. Expert at getting back into your good graces if you allow it, until the next time, and you know there will be a next time because there was a first time so easily. Remember the cues and chalk it up to a life's lesson.

 

Phish is right.

 

 

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Now, now folks... Slinging 5 lb small mouth bass over the side of a boat and having friends is probably worth a little forgiveness and hope 🤣😌😉🎣🙂

 

I would proceed with caution and use the fact that you have been honest to continue that dialogue and be open in the future if toxicity rears its head. At the very least, if this person is making an effort to change, it could benefit other people in his life who suffer from his issues.

 

I think I agree it takes something to admit wrong doing and apologize.  But perhaps he is manipulating you and caution is wise. It's really hard for me to say from my frame of reference.

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I had a fishing buddy one time who I became friends with just because of fishing. Had a decent friendship would fish all the time together. He started to get jealous when I’d take my dad especially to new places. I said dude it’s my dad if you’re going to complain I just won’t take you period. I tell everyone my dad comes first in my boat.

 

that smoothed over we were good. One day he asked me if I needed any jigs poured. I said sure pour me this and that. I never made him pay gas so I assumed this was payment for all the freebie trips he’s had. He has done that in the past just make me jigs for payment which I’m cool with. He goes $10 I said no way dude it cost me more than that every single time I take you.  Gave me the jigs for free than. 
 

Then he started saying things like “we should take this person” “we should start guiding” “we should this or that” I looked at him and said what’s this “we” ****. I said it’s my boat my gas my time I don’t have to let anyone on this boat ever. We haven’t fished together since. 
 

 

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On 11/12/2023 at 6:20 PM, mcipinkie said:

You have two choices:

 

Walk away and say nothing except "No Thanks" when he asks you go.

 

Walk away, confront him gently, and tell him why.

 

I agree with this.  I would not continue to fish with him and just hope it gets it better- it won't.  If he is a decent guy otherwise maybe you want to have a conversation with him and tell him how his tantrums and sulking make it unenjoyable for you and that you have no interest in fishing with him if he can't improve.  I know it is the type of conversation guys don't usually have but it might be worth it since he has a boat you can fish from which let's face it- a guy that has a boat and takes you fishing does have some value.  Good luck.  

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